An ode to Change

Snoop Dogg once said “The only constant in life is change”, or at least I think that was him. Whoever it was that actually said that quote, once we pass a certain age I think most of us realise that that quote holds true in more ways than one.

Of course the world is ever-changing—it still hasn’t been 20 years since the first iPhone released, and we were all watching the same TV show, on the same channel, at the same time. However, I believe the deeper meaning of change comes from within oneself. When I was younger, I used to believe that one day when I had become a “grown-up”, I would stop changing — that all this change and growth of my teens was something temporary. Maybe it’s because as children adults seem to mature and certain; they must have been that way forever right? Now that I am well on my way to being that adult myself, I realise that is total bullshit. We all keep changing forever. We change what we value, we change what we like to do, and we change who we like to spend time with.

What I find comedic about this whole change thing is that almost everyone sees it when looking back at their lives. Most see it in others. Quite a few even rationally accept that they will keep changing in the future. Yet almost nobody behaves as if they know this! Most of us hold onto our past selves, not accepting that we are no longer them. We plan for the future like we will still enjoy the same activities, value the same things, and spend time with the same people. Really think about it: Are you the same person you were 3 years ago? Are you even the same person you were 12 months ago? If not, why do you keep acting like you are? While planning as if you will be in 3 years?

Now I have come to a crossroads. Say we accept this, we internalise the fact that nothing is constant, not even ourselves — that we have in fact changed, and will keep changing in the future. So what? What does that mean for my life and yours, today?

After contemplating and accepting my own change, that question still remained. I am no Nietzsche or Camus, so don’t expect any life changing insights here, but these are the ideas that came through to me.

One, do not cling onto your past self. Too many days have I spent doing something that I used to think was fun, but no longer do. Simply because my slow brain has not accepted that just because I used to like something, does not mean I still do. As a personal anecdote, I used to love clubbing. I would often do it every weekend. Then I found myself standing at the club bored one time, two times, three times. Yet I kept going, kept clubbing, because I knew that I liked it, right? The fact that I was now bored on many nights out did not matter. Because I would not accept that I had in fact changed. That I no longer enjoyed clubbing in the same way as I did before. It took almost a year before I fully let go and accepted this change. Don’t be like me, accept your changes! Also don’t worry I still have fun at the club sometimes, only now I choose to go out in the few, and particular situations where I know the current me will enjoy it.

Second, enjoy yourself while you still can, because the future holds no guarantees. That sounded a little bit too dramatic, so let’s break down what I actually mean. Since it’s the only thing I seem to be able to think about at the moment, I will use my partying in High School as an example. Back in high school my friend group used to have quite a few house parties (I know we were pretty cool actually). I had extremely fun at these parties — talking to strangers who became the friends of the night. Dancing and screaming around a shitty JBL speaker in someone’s parent's house was the best thing I knew. The point of this story is that I had really fun at these parties. But I also know for a fact that if I threw an identical party today (making everyone 6 years older of course!) I would hate it. Therefore I am incredibly glad that I took the opportunity to do what I enjoyed, while I still enjoyed it. I will savour those memories forever. So do what you love now, there is no guarantee you will love it in the future. There is however a guarantee that you will remember the fond memories of today!

Thirdly, be grateful for the change. How boring would life be if we went through it as the same person the whole way. Just as I am now glad that I no longer spend every weekend at a club or house party, in a few years I will be glad that I no longer love something that I love today. For a life of no change is a life of stagnation and boredom. So be grateful for changes, both those already here and those to come.

My conclusion is this: Heraclitus once quoted Snoop Dogg by saying “The only constant in life is change.” He was right. It is up to us to accept this change. To not cling onto the past, to not strive for a future yet to arrive, to instead accept and live fully with who we are at this very moment! To be grateful for the opportunity to live a life of change — for how dull would life be without it? This is my ode to change: let us accept the inevitable!